A high-paying job, significant savings, and investment savvy are essential for those looking to retire early.
Even more important to achieve that goal? A partner or partner who is onboard for the journey, sacrifice and all.
Having a spouse can be a great boon for leaving the 9 to 5 grind before traditional retirement age; Two incomes are better than one, after all, and sharing goals with others can make them easier to accomplish. But people who don’t have the often extreme financial decisions that early retirees face can have the opposite effect.
“The number one reason for divorce is money, because spouses are not on the same page,” says Jody D’agostini, a certified financial planner (CFP) with Equal Advisors. fortune. “Families need to have a consistent plan.”
To retire early, people often work stressful, high-paying, all-consuming jobs that allow them to spend a lot of money in liquid and illiquid investments. They also tend to cut back on other expenses, opting to cut out simple pleasures like eating out, buying new clothes, and more. Such a lifestyle is the backbone of joining the FIRE (financial independence/early retirement) movement.
It’s amazing, but definitely not for everyone. And if they have a partner, pursuing that lifestyle can cause significant stress, says Priya Malani, founder and CEO of Stash Wealth, an advisory firm for HENRYs (High Earners, Not Rich). Even without the added pressure of early retirement, money is a major stressor in relationships.
The saying is true, Malani says: Opposites often attract attention. And that means savers and spenders must learn to respect each other’s goals.
“We joke that 80% of what we do is couples therapy, and numbers are the easy part,” Malani says. “Getting your partner on the same page is key to success.”
It’s important for any couple to talk about values, he said. But especially for early retirees, who by definition have less time to fulfill their financial aspirations.
Ideally, these types of conversations happen before marriage, says Malani — at the latest, when you decide you’re moving in together.
“If your partner doesn’t support your goals, there’s a bigger conversation,” she says. “You can’t ignore the fact that couples come together because, usually, they share the same values. And how we spend money is a direct basis for our values.
And if there’s tension in a relationship related to money, Malani says the best course of action is to have a respectful conversation to identify pain points and come up with a plan to address them. For example, if one partner tends to overspend, setting up automatic savings and investments can help.
“Many of the problems that are perceived as problems are solved with a plan,” he said. “‘That’s why I’m not sticking to our budget.’ Well, if we just put a little of the plan in place and tell them what is important, make it concrete for them…Points of pain can be alleviated by putting goals around the conversation.
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