Credit: Todd Williamson / Bravo
Shannon Beador was preparing to enter the retreat of Kamping after he was left “broken” by his recent separation from John Jansen.
When he and John discussed their verdict, which happened at the end of November, it was only a week later Real Housewives of Orange County Season 17 wrapped up production, Shannon, 58, was revealed to be completely “blindsided” when her now-Ex-boyfriend informed her that he was “done” with a relationship of three and a half years.
“All I can do is repeat what he said when we were filming,” Shannon told PEOPLE on Jan. 11. “We were in a good place. But seven days later, when the cameras went down, it was a very different story. He told me he was done with the relationship. And hearing what he said to me was devastating.
“I’ve never loved another person in my life,” he continued. “I hope this is the person I’ll be with for the rest of my life. I wanted to be able to get out. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love John. But obviously, he doesn’t feel the same way.
Meanwhile, according to John, 59, the decision to end with Shannon “super hard” and came after he realized they would not be far.
“I’ve suffered because of it,” he said. “It’s sad because I love Shannon so much. I have loved her more than any woman in my life. He is one of a kind; so funny and generous and full of life and adventurous. We have a connection unlike anything I could have imagined. And I know that as long as I live, I will never meet someone like him again. But this does not mean that we are suitable for each other in our lives.
“There’s no point if you don’t believe it,” he said.
And why wait until RHOC season 17 has wrapped, John said he does not want to humiliate Shannon on camera.
“The last thing I wanted to do was hurt Shannon, but I think I did the right thing for both of us,” he said. “We are two people who love a lot, but love is not always enough. And when I know Shannon sees it as I have told her I never meant it, I hope she will be able to see that there are no bad people here. These two are very good people which cannot be done.
After their breakup, Shannon and John crossed paths at two University of Southern California games. And, Shannon “hopes” she can “find a way forward.” However, being with each other “just made it difficult” for the two of them and they have kept their distance ever since.
“It was very difficult,” he admits. “I can’t believe he’s not here, and there will be days when I just cry myself to sleep. But it’s a new year, and I’m ready for a new start.”
According to Shannon, she was going to the Golden Door health and wellness retreat in Escondido, California, where she visited in 2016 amid a turbulent relationship with her ex-husband. David Beador58, father of three daughters, Sophie, 21, and twins Stella and Adeline, 18 (he also shares a 23-month-old daughter Anna with his wife. Leslie Beador.
“Being at the Golden Door first gave me clarity about my relationship and helped me find the strength to move forward on the road to freedom. I have no doubt that coming back will give me perspective and healing to start the next chapter from a place of peace,” said Shannon, and she will returned to the facility this month.
In closing, John said he thinks “the world of Shannon” and wants “the best for her.”
“He deserves it,” he said.
Real Housewives of Orange County season 17 is expected to premiere on Bravo sometime later this year.