This week in The Real Housewives of New Jersey we will have an “Italian invasion” of Ireland. Let’s listen to some Celtic music to drown out the grating noise of the RH crew, shall we?
Melissa it has Danielle came Envy to promote a pop-up shop for her clothing line so that Envy can open again to be able to liquidate their inventory. He provided a small shelf in the shop to sell his products. Jennifer attended the event and he was looking for some green clothes for his trip to Ireland. He asks Melissa if she’s upset that she and Dolores were added to the wedding party. Melissa thinks that Teresa has created this split. Jennifer, Tre’s loyal warrior, deduces that Teresa has extended an olive branch and that Melissa should grab a dry stick—even though you’ll end up with a lot of hair splinters.
Melissa asked Danielle what happened to her Rachel, and he called him a mouse. He knew that the worst thing an Italian could say was a rat. Danielle believes that Rachel got on the bus. He thinks Rachel is an ab*tch, and you can see this loudmouth doesn’t like to be busted. Danielle forgives but never forgets – sounds familiar right? What would you consider another old-school Italian tradition?
Dolores visited with Paul’s brother David and his wife and they looked like a jovial couple. He loved Paul’s family and was very happy to know them. Dolores has found a castle in Westmeath to travel to, but she is concerned about bringing this group of broken women to Paul’s country. Paul says they need to watch their behavior because Irish people will imitate good and bad behavior. They need to know that Irish people have boundaries they will not cross!
Margaret shared with Joe that he found the reader to be an imposter. DUH, Marge everyone can see through that bullshit. Marge seems concerned about what Laura shared with Jennifer and Teresa.
Louie says it’s impossible to have a conversation with Joe because he doesn’t fall for fake a*s. He didn’t have the energy to deal with Joe or full access to Tre’s bank account. Teresa claims in ITM that Louie took a beating and lost money. Side note: Louie has no credibility IMO, and he’s a gifted sycophant who believes Teresa is the best thing that ever happened to him.
Jennifer tells Bill that she is planning a bachelorette party for Teresa. He plans to get rid of Marge because she has ruined his family. Jennifer asks Bill to spend more time with the kids and offers to give up golf to spend time with the kids. He didn’t want Bill to run away from them and hide in the pool house. Bill will consider going back to counseling, but I think he’s just cheering him on…
Ladies headed to Ireland and it’s gorgeous there. Rachel won’t let Bougie Barbie ruin her trip. What is Marge wearing? Did he borrow something from Danielle’s dirty laundry hamper? Jen F. revealed that she slept with James Gandolfini. He goes to a S&M bar with her, and she sees him as the one who leaves. WOW, what a great story – Jen slept with Tony Soprano, why not make it the story for this season instead of Louie-kenstein’s Bride?
Melissa wants to know if the castle is haunted. He should have been more concerned with running into Teresa in the dark while she was looking for the bathroom. Melissa had to suffer with a small mirror. He was afraid to sleep there alone, so he would move so he could sleep with someone else which has better lighting and mirrors. Jennifer has got a very nice room and she is happy because you know she has slept in the castle.
Dolores told her Jackie he had to watch what he said because he had gone too far with his questions about Danielle’s family feud. Jennifer finally admits to Angie the healer that she and Marge were fighting. He admitted to ITM that he actually told the reader the night before that he ruined everything he wanted. Marge is right and Teresa defends Angie because she knew when she told him that Prince Charming was named Louie-character.
Jennifer is bursting at the seams to share what Marge’s Ex-BFF Laura has shared. He loved watching Marge squirm because he loved seeing her sweat—but the whole crew was melting before his eyes because there was no air conditioning in the castle. Teresa’s skin looked like liquid lava had been baked on her face and was now melting and pooling on her swollen lips.
Jennifer didn’t want to tell Danielle what she knew because she would look like a hypocrite. They had a full story last season because Marge’s story came out last season. Jennifer then tells Danielle that Laura told her that someone saw Melissa making out with a man. He says that Teresa wants to know this information about Melissa. Danielle now says she doesn’t know about it. It must be true, I can see you starting to glow when you hear this.
He had planned a pub crawl for Teresa’s bachelorette party. Teresa remembers her first bachelorette party, and she thinks that “Channing Taming” might be the stripper she saw. He came clomping down the stairs like a blind Clydesdale in a white tutu. Tre thinks she is Marilyn Monroe and there is a similarity – Marilyn also has a bad taste in people.
Jane F. then opened a pandora’s box of countless years of division. She asks Teresa why she chose Dolores and Jennifer as her bridesmaids. Teresa then babbles they are big supporters of Louie and have liked him from the beginning. He then spews out some nonsense about being nervous to ask them because he doesn’t want any more problems with his sister. Jennifer then reveals that Melissa was only invited to the party out of obligation.
Teresa then shared some important news saying “I’m not perfect as much as I make mistakes.” He then pivots and makes it Joe and Melissa’s fault that Donna was not invited to the wedding. Teresa then added more salt to the wound and revealed that she invited many mothers to this table for her wedding. He then proceeded to spew more nonsense from his overlubricated lips about being a cool sister.
Teresa can only see this situation as another opportunity to throw him under the bus. He then said that he never threw Joe under the bus. Melissa couldn’t take one more minute of this crazy talk and only wanted to say something positive. Jackie and Jen F. decided to lighten the mood and give two limericks that help lighten the mood—now…
Next week, Teresa will talk about Antonia. I don’t think that Melissa will be able to stay silent through that diss. Happy Wednesday and join me tonight for the RB podcast! If you are interested in co-hosting please email me at [email protected]
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